on move on with grace.

Ah it’s been really good year despite of the rollah coaster stuff. But life ain't life without all those crappy stuff, right? What will you tell to your childrens then, “eh i spent my youth just sitting and not trying to do anything or following my heart just because i'm afraid of doing something wrong” ha! Amusing story!.

I've learn for the past 2 years that, no matter how hard you keep others' feelings, trying not to hurt them, there will always people who feel hurt by you, was offended, and always felt they were a victim of your actions. as long as I know, my parents always taught me to respect others, but there are some things beyond my power, that is the opinion of others about me, about what i do, that i couldn't control.

People will judge you, blame you and discredit you, no matter how hard you try to explain to them, they just do. And just now, I let other people down too, no matter how hard i try to not to. And boy i do believe in karma, i'm not God, i made mistake and at a certain point the universe will put me in the situation where i cant avoid from feeling hurting, offended and other things as a reward of my action in the past. I'm fully aware of that.

Well, it ain't life if you cant learn from your mistake. I learn from every single things from everything that I've done. And for everything that has been done by me; it cannot be changed, undone or forgotten. But let me say here, with bountiful, humble, heart open, I’am sorry. I will take it all as lessons learned and move on with grace. Cause i believe there’s always a second chance, or maybe more depend on how long you’ll live (and how gracious God to you) And it's our task not to wasting our time just regretting stuff we did in the past, rather one must using all their energy and capacity to move toward a better ones. 


*up above the Flores sky

on another starting point

Recently I read on one of my friend status on facebook “Why wait until January next year to start things?!” I smirk. It is very common that every of us ending the year with a new to-do list and resolution. Many of us become more serious about life. We plan new courses of action to better our lives. People evaluate their lives and plan and resolve to take action. Every resolution you make on this day implies that you are in control of your self, that you are not a victim fated by circumstance, controlled by stars, owned by luck, but that you are an individual who can make choices to change your life. (Oh the feeling of breathing the fresh new day)

But it is really, necessary? For my whole life I have never made any of lists (I’m not really good with list, actually). I guess it’s not that bad to make some. It makes us stay focus on our goals (talking about minimizing all the dramas in life). But I guess, for me, I'm sticking with the magic of life (what a hopelessly romantic i am). Let life overwhelm me with surprises  for that I pray that everything will go smoothly for my family and loved ones. And of course, its life not a happy ending Hollywood movie, shit does happen in a real life. And I pray nothing but a set of patience, strength, and compassion for all of us, to deal with it.

After all, it is always great to have a momentum. Where you can pause for a while for a contemplating and just be in your own moment, but not for a long dwell as the show must go on.